19 June 2026

As a coach, peer, mentor, manager, friend and individual, I have come to learn that the cycle of anxiety steals moments of joy from us all.

Feelings of inadequacy, comparison and fear rooted in anxiety can reduce and diminish the most meaningful accomplishments to a side note in a catalogue of our own perceived failures. The emails you didn’t send, the project that wasn’t as good as you thought it should be, the new process you were sure other people were learning faster and more easily than you were able to. 

Each of these examples are my examples, from the past week, month, year. My failures, my comparisons, my rejections of accomplishment.

In coaching, I am the devil’s advocate - I believe in my clients when they do not. I look to their successes and challenges to understand their strengths. I don’t minimise their negative thoughts - I ask clients to look to understand where they came from - how they came into being - are they true or a story they’ve told themselves.

In life, I am the client. I tell myself stories of failure, usually based in fear. I get caught up in my own head. I sometimes get so confused by the positive perception people have of me, that I cannot connect the two perspectives. I can get trapped in my own head looking at my perceived failings and live in fear and negative thinking, and I have to work really hard against that.

I finished coaching with a client today, and I am so proud of her. I had such joy from looking at her accomplishments, knowing how hard she worked, and how much she believed in me and trusted me to guide her. And today I am trying to remember to also be proud of myself for facilitating that.

I have worked with some amazing people over the course of my life. Extraordinarily talented people who had achieved amazing things, but diminished their accomplishments in their own eyes, who forgot to be proud of what they achieved. For anyone reading this today, I’d encourage you to take a minute to be your own devil’s advocate - ask yourself if your worth is really defined by the email you didn’t send. Or the piece of work you completed that wasn’t perfect. Instead celebrate your wins this week, no matter how small they might seem. A win is still a win.

Anxiety is my thief. It sneaks in unannounced and diminishes moments of accomplishment into comparison. It has done all my life. Today I’m reminding myself I’m succeeding, in small ways every day. I hope this helps you remember you are too.